dave the dead
12-26-2008, 09:27 AM
This is something I wrote a while ago and came across recently. Not sure how this fits in to the forum, but thought there may be a few folks on here who might 'get a kick' out of it.....
The Golden Foot of Archie McCain
Archie McCain had a golden foot. His father knew it early on. Young Archie, barely able to walk, could kick his SpongeBob ball halfway across the living room. Archie's dad would smile a huge toothy grin and say proudly to his wife, "That boy has a golden foot. If he keeps kicking like that, he'll be set for life." Archie and his dad spent hours playing ball every evening, and by the time Archie was ready for kindergarten he could kick a football over the roof of his house. Every night, Archie's dad tucked him into bed and would say "Archie, that foot of yours in turning to gold. You keep kicking like that and you'll be set for life. Don't you change a thing Archie. You'll be set for life." Archie fell asleep each night dreaming of playing football and kicking the winning fieldgoal in the big game.
The old codgers that lived on Archie's street remember him well. They would sit on their front porches on the hot summer evenings and watch Archie place kick the football up Green Street. "That boy sure can kick" they would say as they smoked their stogies and drank their Milwaukee's Best. "Yep, that foot of his is turnin' to gold." Archie spent hours upon hours kicking that football, dreaming of his chance to win the big game.
By the time he was in junior high school, Archie's parents had to special order steel toed shoes from the Redwing store downtown. Archie spent so much time kicking the football that he kept wearing holes in the toes of his shoes. The special shoes were expensive, but not nearly as expensive as replacing a pair of lesser shoes each week. His parents had very little money, but gladly paid the extra to keep Archie's golden foot protected. "Archie, you just keep kicking," his dad would say as he tucked him into his small bed with its tattered mattress and torn sheets. "That foot of yours is turning to gold. Don't you change a thing and you'll be set for life." Archie fell asleep and dreamed of kicking the winning fieldgoal in the big game.
By the time he was in highschool, Archie had become very popular because of his golden foot. He was the youngest player ever to make the varsity squad. A gang of girls followed him everywhere, competing for the chance to be his first love. "Don't let them girls distract you Archie, " his dad warned. "If you just keep kicking, you'll get a full scholarship to college. That foot of yours is golden, Archie. Don't you change a thing and you'll be set for life." Archie knew it was true. He could see well beyond high school by now. He dreamt of college and of kicking the winning fieldgoal in the Rosebowl. Archie also knew that his parents couldn't afford to send him to college, especially now that he was wearing out the toes of his special Redwings at the rate of about a pair each season. Archie spent all his free time kicking the football, ignoring the advances of the entire cheer squad.
On Homecoming night, the score was tied with just a few seconds left. Archie's team had the ball and it was 3rd and long. Archie trotted onto the field with confidence, knowing his time had come. Even though it was to be a 62 yard attempt, the coach knew it was in the bag. The ball was snapped, and just as he had dreamed his entire life, Archie floated the ball through the uprights, carving his name in the school record books as having kicked the longest fieldgoal ever. As he prepared to bask in the glory of the homecoming dance and dressed to go meet his date, Archie's dad helped him straighten his tie and said in a solemn tone, "Archie, now you listen to me, boy. Don't you sleep with that girl, Archie. You're almost there, boy. That foot of yours is golden, and there were college scouts watching you tonight. Don't you change a thing, and you'll be set for life. Promise me boy. Don't you mess around with that girl." Archie knew it was true. If he could just make it to college he had plenty of time then for girls. His golden foot would get him there as long as he didn't change a thing.
The old codgers watched as Archie particed kicking the ball. They smoked their stogies and drank their Milwaukee's Best. "I swear to ya," one would say to the other," I can see sparks when that boy hammers that football. I ain't never seen nothin like it." They marveled to each other each time the ball went sailing down Green Street.
Ths scouts took notice of Archie's monumental game-winning record kick, and now took turns knocking on the McCain's front door. Over the coming month's, Archie had been visited by representatives from every Big 10 college, each extolling the virtues of their particular interest, trying to get a piece of Archie's golden foot. Archie's dad loved the attention, and spent many hours chatting with the scouts and taking advantage of their spending accounts. He never hesitated to suggest that perhaps they should discuss his boy's future over dinner, knowing that each college would try to outspend the next. "Archie, my boy'" his father now said,"you have earned your ticket to college. Now is the time for you to start thinking pro. Keep your mind on kicking and you will be set for life."
It didn't take long before Archie became a sensation in college. The fans now cheered everytime he took the field, knowing it meant a sure 3 points no matter what the distance. His followers now made yellow cardboard cutouts to wave like a flag as they chanted his name from the stands. Archie continued to practice, continued to wear holes in his shoes, and continued to dream of kicking the winning fieldgoal in the Rose Bowl. However, in his blossoming manhood, Archie had noticed a particular young lady that soon became his steady girlfriend. They quickly became serious about each other, but Archie still dreamed of kicking and stayed true to his father's advice. He explained to her why they couldn't take their relationship to the next level, and promised that as soon as kicked the winning fieldgoal in the Rosebowl and signed a contract with the NFL, they would be married and could do whatever they pleased. "Don't you mess around with that girl." his father's advice still rang true in his ears. " Don't you change a thing Archie, and you will be set for life." His father's advice had been sound all these years, and he had followed and trusted this mantra. It had taken him this far...just a bit longer and he could share his dreams with his new found love.
It was a phenomenal year for Archie's team. They won every game, although some did come down to a last ditch fieldgoal from rediculously long distances. In these games, the coach would laugh and send in the man with the golden foot. It was like money in the bank. Archie sliced the college records, and knew it was all coming true. His future was already written. He was set for life. Knowing this, Archie's dreams now turned to love and sex and marriage.....and kicking with his golden foot.
The night before his team got the official announcement that they were bound for the Rose Bowl, Archie tossed and turned in his sleep. He dreamt of his father's advise. "Archie, don't you mess around with that girl until you sign an NFL contract. You have a golden foot, boy. Don't change anything and you'll be set for life" he dreamt of kicking, he dreamt of contracts and mansions, but mostly he dreamt of Anne. Archie truly was in love with her, and would ask her to marry him right after he won the Rose Bowl.
It had been an amazing journey, and Archie could hardly believe it had all come true as he walked into the locker room in Pasedena, wearing a pair of nearly worn out Redwings. This was what he had been dreaming of his entire life. Every night filled with dreams of kicking. Every night heeding his father's advice...."Don't change a thing." The world now revolved around him. He had it in the bag. His life was laid out for him and he knew it. The game would come down to seconds and yet another impossible feildgoal. His parents, freinds, schoolmates, fans (and even old codgers) would be watching as he kicked the gamewinning fieldgoal. Every NFL drafter would be salivating to own the golden foot. The world now belonged to Archie McCain. And his dreams played out exactly as the script had been written. It all came down to 3 seconds on the clock, and Archie's golden foot was called in to save the day.
In the celebration afterwards, Archie knelt down on a knee and proposed to Anne. She immediately accepted, and they embraced, the crowd melting away until there was noone left in the world but his dear sweet Anne. It was a moment like Archie had never felt, and his love swept all thoughts of contracts aside. "I've made it already, he thought to himself. Nothing could change my path now. Every NFL team wants me...the contract is mine with whoever I want. " He gave Anne a knowing wink, and they rushed upstairs to celebrate the win, their engagement and spend the night making sweet, passionate love to each other.
The Golden Foot of Archie McCain
Archie McCain had a golden foot. His father knew it early on. Young Archie, barely able to walk, could kick his SpongeBob ball halfway across the living room. Archie's dad would smile a huge toothy grin and say proudly to his wife, "That boy has a golden foot. If he keeps kicking like that, he'll be set for life." Archie and his dad spent hours playing ball every evening, and by the time Archie was ready for kindergarten he could kick a football over the roof of his house. Every night, Archie's dad tucked him into bed and would say "Archie, that foot of yours in turning to gold. You keep kicking like that and you'll be set for life. Don't you change a thing Archie. You'll be set for life." Archie fell asleep each night dreaming of playing football and kicking the winning fieldgoal in the big game.
The old codgers that lived on Archie's street remember him well. They would sit on their front porches on the hot summer evenings and watch Archie place kick the football up Green Street. "That boy sure can kick" they would say as they smoked their stogies and drank their Milwaukee's Best. "Yep, that foot of his is turnin' to gold." Archie spent hours upon hours kicking that football, dreaming of his chance to win the big game.
By the time he was in junior high school, Archie's parents had to special order steel toed shoes from the Redwing store downtown. Archie spent so much time kicking the football that he kept wearing holes in the toes of his shoes. The special shoes were expensive, but not nearly as expensive as replacing a pair of lesser shoes each week. His parents had very little money, but gladly paid the extra to keep Archie's golden foot protected. "Archie, you just keep kicking," his dad would say as he tucked him into his small bed with its tattered mattress and torn sheets. "That foot of yours is turning to gold. Don't you change a thing and you'll be set for life." Archie fell asleep and dreamed of kicking the winning fieldgoal in the big game.
By the time he was in highschool, Archie had become very popular because of his golden foot. He was the youngest player ever to make the varsity squad. A gang of girls followed him everywhere, competing for the chance to be his first love. "Don't let them girls distract you Archie, " his dad warned. "If you just keep kicking, you'll get a full scholarship to college. That foot of yours is golden, Archie. Don't you change a thing and you'll be set for life." Archie knew it was true. He could see well beyond high school by now. He dreamt of college and of kicking the winning fieldgoal in the Rosebowl. Archie also knew that his parents couldn't afford to send him to college, especially now that he was wearing out the toes of his special Redwings at the rate of about a pair each season. Archie spent all his free time kicking the football, ignoring the advances of the entire cheer squad.
On Homecoming night, the score was tied with just a few seconds left. Archie's team had the ball and it was 3rd and long. Archie trotted onto the field with confidence, knowing his time had come. Even though it was to be a 62 yard attempt, the coach knew it was in the bag. The ball was snapped, and just as he had dreamed his entire life, Archie floated the ball through the uprights, carving his name in the school record books as having kicked the longest fieldgoal ever. As he prepared to bask in the glory of the homecoming dance and dressed to go meet his date, Archie's dad helped him straighten his tie and said in a solemn tone, "Archie, now you listen to me, boy. Don't you sleep with that girl, Archie. You're almost there, boy. That foot of yours is golden, and there were college scouts watching you tonight. Don't you change a thing, and you'll be set for life. Promise me boy. Don't you mess around with that girl." Archie knew it was true. If he could just make it to college he had plenty of time then for girls. His golden foot would get him there as long as he didn't change a thing.
The old codgers watched as Archie particed kicking the ball. They smoked their stogies and drank their Milwaukee's Best. "I swear to ya," one would say to the other," I can see sparks when that boy hammers that football. I ain't never seen nothin like it." They marveled to each other each time the ball went sailing down Green Street.
Ths scouts took notice of Archie's monumental game-winning record kick, and now took turns knocking on the McCain's front door. Over the coming month's, Archie had been visited by representatives from every Big 10 college, each extolling the virtues of their particular interest, trying to get a piece of Archie's golden foot. Archie's dad loved the attention, and spent many hours chatting with the scouts and taking advantage of their spending accounts. He never hesitated to suggest that perhaps they should discuss his boy's future over dinner, knowing that each college would try to outspend the next. "Archie, my boy'" his father now said,"you have earned your ticket to college. Now is the time for you to start thinking pro. Keep your mind on kicking and you will be set for life."
It didn't take long before Archie became a sensation in college. The fans now cheered everytime he took the field, knowing it meant a sure 3 points no matter what the distance. His followers now made yellow cardboard cutouts to wave like a flag as they chanted his name from the stands. Archie continued to practice, continued to wear holes in his shoes, and continued to dream of kicking the winning fieldgoal in the Rose Bowl. However, in his blossoming manhood, Archie had noticed a particular young lady that soon became his steady girlfriend. They quickly became serious about each other, but Archie still dreamed of kicking and stayed true to his father's advice. He explained to her why they couldn't take their relationship to the next level, and promised that as soon as kicked the winning fieldgoal in the Rosebowl and signed a contract with the NFL, they would be married and could do whatever they pleased. "Don't you mess around with that girl." his father's advice still rang true in his ears. " Don't you change a thing Archie, and you will be set for life." His father's advice had been sound all these years, and he had followed and trusted this mantra. It had taken him this far...just a bit longer and he could share his dreams with his new found love.
It was a phenomenal year for Archie's team. They won every game, although some did come down to a last ditch fieldgoal from rediculously long distances. In these games, the coach would laugh and send in the man with the golden foot. It was like money in the bank. Archie sliced the college records, and knew it was all coming true. His future was already written. He was set for life. Knowing this, Archie's dreams now turned to love and sex and marriage.....and kicking with his golden foot.
The night before his team got the official announcement that they were bound for the Rose Bowl, Archie tossed and turned in his sleep. He dreamt of his father's advise. "Archie, don't you mess around with that girl until you sign an NFL contract. You have a golden foot, boy. Don't change anything and you'll be set for life" he dreamt of kicking, he dreamt of contracts and mansions, but mostly he dreamt of Anne. Archie truly was in love with her, and would ask her to marry him right after he won the Rose Bowl.
It had been an amazing journey, and Archie could hardly believe it had all come true as he walked into the locker room in Pasedena, wearing a pair of nearly worn out Redwings. This was what he had been dreaming of his entire life. Every night filled with dreams of kicking. Every night heeding his father's advice...."Don't change a thing." The world now revolved around him. He had it in the bag. His life was laid out for him and he knew it. The game would come down to seconds and yet another impossible feildgoal. His parents, freinds, schoolmates, fans (and even old codgers) would be watching as he kicked the gamewinning fieldgoal. Every NFL drafter would be salivating to own the golden foot. The world now belonged to Archie McCain. And his dreams played out exactly as the script had been written. It all came down to 3 seconds on the clock, and Archie's golden foot was called in to save the day.
In the celebration afterwards, Archie knelt down on a knee and proposed to Anne. She immediately accepted, and they embraced, the crowd melting away until there was noone left in the world but his dear sweet Anne. It was a moment like Archie had never felt, and his love swept all thoughts of contracts aside. "I've made it already, he thought to himself. Nothing could change my path now. Every NFL team wants me...the contract is mine with whoever I want. " He gave Anne a knowing wink, and they rushed upstairs to celebrate the win, their engagement and spend the night making sweet, passionate love to each other.