[Terrormaster]

Hey Haunters,

Like many of you out there we do a little Halloween soiree every year. We like to call it "The Gathering of Spirits". So 2018 marks the 10th annual gathering so I wanted to up the game a little.

We don't have a big house so our guests tend to max out at around 25-30. Typically it has been very informal gathering of friends and family. Basically an indoor evening cookout with Halloween decorations and costumes (which were mainly the kids). The food and music generally Halloween themed. In the last few years we added pumpkin decorating. Last year we added mummy-dogs (the kids get to make their own and the adults would handle the baking).

So for our 10th I wanted to try formalizing things more.

We usually send out invitations (sometimes fancy). But getting anyone to RSVP in any form (call, email, even accepting FB event invites) has been a constant hassle. Most of the guests are family and take the "we're family, we were invited and therefore obligated to go so no rsvp necessary" attitude. This year I'm thinking of enforcing it. It really does help in ensuring we have enough food and drink.

The other aspect is costuming. Typically it's been involuntary. The kids tend to wear the same costume they'll be wearing for Halloween night. With the exception of a few of our friends and myself (I always costume), the adults almost always NEVER wear costumes. So this year I want enforce a costumes required for all rule - fitting in with our theme -- WITCHES.

The mrs thinks it will be imposing because the kids will end up having to get or make two costumes. But I've really been hankering to do a fully themed soiree.

I suggested we ask family and friends for their input so we don't impose. But communication is not really a strong quality in this family. Because no one uses email anymore I tried FB Events and FB messaging to no avail. They have time to respond to animal memes I post. But not to important things. I get no responses from anyone. Yet they always manage to show for the party.

I just don't what to do...

 

[Terrormaster]

I was hoping to have this discussion with them as a group so we could collaboratively work something out. I stopped using emails to communicate with them for family gatherings because everyone kept saying "message me on Facebook instead". So I do that and still next to nothing. Heck half of the invitees on the FB event haven't accepted even. Coordinating a family meeting isn't easy either. So its down to electronic. I can't stand having conversations with my mobile device. But looks like it might come down to group text messaging to get it in front of their eyes.

As for the costuming I did post about it in the FB event (for what little that's worth). And I think I was pretty fair. Gave plenty of choices which fit the theme. And even given them the option of coming in formal masquerade attire (dress clothes and a masquerade mask) if costumes were a burden.

Here's what I posted:

Going forward The Gathering of the Spirits will be transitioning to a costumed only event. So what does that mean? While this may be a family friendly event, all guests are expected to arrive costumed. Costumes should align with our theme which is typically Halloween centric (sorry superheroes and princesses). If a themed costume is not feasible for you or your goblins, masquerade attire is acceptable. Masquerade attire is formal wear such as coat and tie or dress complemented with a masquerade mask.

This year's theme is The Witching Hour. Costume choices should be anything related to witches, witchcraft, and black magic. Classic, period, or modern. Witches and warlocks are the order of the day. Don't limit yourself though. Other costumes which fit our theme are also welcome, including: Pagan Gods and Goddesses, Druids, Gothic, Faery, Steampunk, Historical, Dark Angel, Mythology, Medieval, Renaissance, Vampire, Fairy-Tale, and anything else that comes to mind. Not feeling creative - just think robes and pointy hats and you'll do fine.

Lastly a friendly reminder - this is still a family friendly event. Dark and creepy are always welcome and highly encouraged. But please avoid blood and gore in your costume choices. And of course no "sexy" or gag costumes please - this is not a college party.

Again, I think the above is fair. But maybe that's just me. Mrs says just don't do it. My thoughts are why compromise my vision without at least having a discussion with the guests first. If I went her way there will always be that nagging question in the back of my head of what could have been and didn't because we didn't ask.