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The Chupacabra Thread

9745 Views 60 Replies 26 Participants Last post by  debbie5
I don't know what it is, but I've heard of it. What the heck is it?
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Chupa craziness!

:D Chupacabra to Congress: Without Us, Who Will Drink the Blood of Your Goats?
By Chad Fifer, Mar 29, 2006
As the Senate begins to overhaul the particularly harsh immigration policy passed by the House, thousands of pro-immigrant protestors have taken to the streets to voice their opinion -- among them, the elusive Chupacabra!

From: Anónimo

To: The United States Senate

Re: U.S. Immigration Policy

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Senate,


I am writing to you from a small cave somewhere in the American Southwest, my humble home since 1996. I live a quiet life here, and rarely involve myself in politics of any kind. There is a reason for this, which I am sure many of you may have already guessed. You see, I am an illegal immigrant in this country, and live in constant fear of deportation at the hands of your INS agents. In addition, I am El Chupacabra, famed goat-sucker of Latin legend.

As I said, I normally keep my political opinions (as well as my scaly, greenish-gray body) hidden from others, but was so moved by the thousands of students who left school this week to march in support of immigrant rights that I felt compelled to step up and lend my voice to the cause. My horrible, braying, unnatural voice.

Allow me to tell you my story. I was born in Iztapalapa, one of the poorest areas of Mexico City, in a small shack made of cinder blocks. My mother was a beautiful young seamstress who had been kicked out of the house when her family discovered she was pregnant without a husband. My father was a Chupacabra who inseminated her while she slept before boarding an orb of light and fleeing to the farthest regions of the galaxy.

It was difficult growing up without a father to teach me how to play baseball or ride a bike, and my human mother only shrieked and stabbed at me when I approached our filthy dwelling. Clean water was scarce, as were the delicious goats that filled my dreams. The only thing that kept me warm at night as I drifted off to sleep in the local dump, clutching the carcass of a rat or mangy squirrel, was the dream of a better world where the livestock were plenty. A better world. America.

I first attempted to make my way across the border at 16 by pulling the stuffing from an enormous Tweety Bird doll and sewing myself inside. As any cryptozoologist can tell you, the mature Chupacabra is typically between three and four feet tall, but since I was still young, it seemed an easy fit. Once concealed, I attempted to get myself sold on the Tijuana border as a cheap souvenir for American tourists. Unfortunately, I had not thought to ask for the assistance of a roadside seller, and all of the drivers squealed away in horror at the sight of a dirty Tweety Bird hopping toward them in the rearview mirror, the sharp quills of my back protruding through the doll's furry yellow hide.

Although daunted by this first experience, I eventually did make it across the border by hiding inside of a small shipping container in the back of a truck, nearly dying of dehydration in the process. Were there an easier way for me to come to America legally (and also if I weren't a horrific creature of urban legend that would doubtless be quarantined by the military, tested and destroyed), of course I would have done it. But so desperately did I crave escape from the misery of my own land that the risk of death was not too great. I would have done anything to get here. And my story is not rare.

I understand that after the terrorist attacks on this country, Americans are nervous about protecting their borders, but we must remember that this is a country built by immigrants! You may deride the Mexicans and los Chubacabras now, but remember how the Italians were treated when they came here. Or the Irish. Or the Chinese. They were all considered swarthy, shifty, un-American immigrants at one time. Now, these groups make up the backbone of society and own many, many goats that I will suck on.

I am so tired of hearing American citizens talk about how the illegal immigrants are coming in and taking their jobs from them. Come on! If we weren't illegal, you wouldn't be able to get away with paying us next to nothing. And do you really want to have those jobs? Do you really want to clean toilets, or wash dishes, or maul livestock all night long? I mean, can you imagine your typical New York stockbroker having to sneak onto a farmer's property in the middle of the night and quietly drink the blood of five goats? Forget about it! First of all, he wouldn't possess the dread gaze of the Chupacabra, a gaze which makes all animals freeze and succumb to my vampiric embrace. Secondly, he wouldn't want to get his fancy suit all dirty.

I am glad that Congress is finally making some attempts to deal with the 11 million unauthorized migrants and 15 elusive Chupacabras now in the United States, but the bill passed by the House to make all of us felons is ridiculous. And the perception that we are coming into this country in order to take advantage of America's benefits while we lie around doing nothing is just plain stupid. We work hard for next to nothing, always afraid of being deported back to the squalor from which we came. We are an engine for this country, and we want to be accepted by this country. Yes, we have broken laws to get here, but many of us needed a solution right away, and the slow motion of the bureaucracies just would not do. Also, the number of goat attacks on children has dropped to an all-time low since we got here. It's true. Seriously.

The Senate Judiciary Committee's recommendation to allow illegal immigrants to stay after paying a fine, learning English and getting a background check is preferable to what the House wants, although the fines are a bit steep - $1,000 now, $1,000 later, plus any back taxes we might owe. Chupa ain't got that kind of scratch - I don't know where you're getting your figures. Maybe you let people work it off over time - something reasonable like that. Chupa don't have all the answers, neither. But as you continue to work toward a solution, you should remember that even though many of us don't know English, we do know "give me your hungry, your tired, your poor." We are poor, we are tired, and we are hungry for the blood of your small and defenseless livestock (or domestic pets if we happen to be located in an urban center).

We are the American dream.

The Weekly Memo is a biweekly behind-the-scenes look at the revealing correspondence of our most fascinating thinkers, leaders, celebrities, and weirdoes.

I swear, you can find ANYTHING on the 'net!:D :cool:
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Chupacabra sighting at Discovery Science Center

Chupacabra sighting at Discovery Science Center
To lure kids into learning about real animals, the museum features a mythical one.
The Orange County Register
Tuesday, October 24, 2006

SANTA ANA - Word traveled fast in Salvatierra, Art Guevara's hometown in Mexico. A chupacabra, a bloodsucking monster, slaughtered a neighbor's farm animals. Children who played on the farms and in the fields at night would be next, parents warned. But Guevara, then about 7 years old, and his friends planned to catch the menacing chupacabra with a net.

"It was scary. We stayed out the whole night and when we caught it, we called everyone to see the chupacabra," said Guevara, 56. "And then we realized it actually was a coyote."

The half-man, half-beast monster has never been photographed, but the Discovery Science Center is offering insight into the mythical creature through an exhibit that runs until Nov. 5. The display is part of Discovery's Spooky Science program, which uses monsters to explore aspects of science. To understand the chupacabra, children can learn about real creatures that share its traits. The exhibit features leeches and mosquitoes, other bloodsucking organisms. And it looks at specimens such as fleas, which share the hind-leg features that the chupacabra purportedly uses to pounce on its prey.

"What we like to do at the Discovery Science Center is offer something to spark a kid's interest and then show them the science behind it," said spokeswoman Julie Smith. But Discovery leaves the mystery of the chupacabra to its guests. There are no images or figures of the creature, which is said to have razor-sharp fangs, scaly skin and haunting red eyes.

Some Orange County residents thought they spotted a chupacabra in Santa Ana in 1996, according to news reports. A construction worker who fell asleep near his apartment window said he woke up to see a large, shadowy figure of the legendary beast. Guevara said the stories may have been a parental tactic to keep mischievous children like him home at night. But, despite his chupacabra hunts, he has never stopped believing the urban legend. "They would prefer little kids over grown-ups and animals, they would tell us," he said. "We couldn't help but be scared."


The first chupacabra "sighting" was in Puerto Rico in 1975. Goats had been killed and their blood drained. Chupacabra, a Spanish word, translates as "goat sucker." Sightings span from South America to Michigan.

The chupacabra's origin is disputed. Some say they are pets left behind by aliens, animals from another dimension or creatures that have gone unnoticed since the time of the dinosaurs.

The creature has never been photographed, but people describe it as such:

• Half man, half beast
• 4 to 5 feet tall
• Leaps up to 20 feet with its powerful hind legs.
• Spikes stretch from the head to bottom of its back.
• Reptilian skin changes colors.
• Red eyes
• Long fangs

Source: The Discovery Science Center

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Ah, we can never have enough chupa stories!:p
Arkansas chupacabra?

Animal baffles Johnson County residents
Nov 13, 2006 08:08 PM EST

JOHNSON COUNTY--A strange animal in one Arkansas county has residents looking for answers as to what it is. The Arkansas Game and Fish Commission say it's a dog, but some residents disagree.

Some people say it's a cross between a wild dog and coyote, but others say there's an air of mystery surrounding the animal. Some even think it has characteristics of a Chupacabra, an animal from a Hispanic legend.

Deer hunters have more than one animal to talk about when they check their hunt in at McCormick's One Stop.

"Everyone that comes in has their own opinion," Matt McCormick said.

Ideas circulate among the customers about this animal, one Johnson County residents' can't agree on what to call it. McCormick's has pictures on the counter if you want to get a good look at it.

They're "just kind of curious as to what it is. It's got everybody's interest perked up," McCormick said.

These pictures were taken October fourth, one day after the animal was shot. The photographer sent them to the Arkansas Game and Fish Commission for an answer, and they got one. But many residents say they're not convinced it's a dog with a severe case of mange.

Some people have been digging for another explanation, and they think they found it in the urban legend of Chupacabra. According to the Hispanic legend, Chupacabra can come in three forms one of which is a strange breed of wild dog, mostly hairless with pronounced eye sockets, teeth and claws.

But some people say that idea is far fetched.

"It's a funny colored dog so got to calling it a dog from hell. It's just a regular dog," Johnson County resident Gerry McCartney said.

McCartney says the idea that's it's anything other than a dog is off the wall, because she's had a run-in with the animal in her yard.

"I came out one night and shot up in air to get it gone off my dogs," she said.

People in the county continue to talk of this animal although its dead, they're confident others are alive.

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"What the heck is it, Edgar?"

That is not a dog.
Some sort of demented meerkat,perhaps.:p

It's ugly, whatever it is.:eek:
Agreed - it looks like a sick prairie dog kinda thing.
Texas Woman Claims to Have Found Mythical 'Chupacabra'


No pictures though.
Comcast had a blurb on the Chupacabra with a small pic:

The Chupacabra thread

This story involves some dead chickens and concern there's - yup, you guessed it - a chupacabra on the loose.

How is it all these poor dead hairless animals automatically get consigned to the "chupacabra" bin? It makes me wonder - if aliens came to this planet, would they think bald men were some strange species also?:D:googly:
Looks like a publicity stunt. Pull your gaff, call the media, return gaff again .
Why do all carny guys look alike?? Carny as in -val, not-niverous....
more chupacabra sightings in texas!

this is one ugly animal!

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