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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Now, what good would a Best of, list be without a Worst of? Here go some atrocities that made my Hall of Shame this past year.

THE WORST HORROR FILMS OF 2005

1. Cursed. The things that are wrong about this film would read off like a shopping list. The name alone suits it. Hounded earlier on in production by a stack of problems, many of the names connected with the film either walked off the set or were fired. I've always thought Wes Craven wasn't a very good film director and boy was I proven wrong; he's much worse than I ever imagined and this movie proves it. A PG-13 version of this film hit the theater which was released to DVD alongside an "Unrated" version. The same happened with the second entry on my list (which actually tied this movie for being the worst) Here's a new rule that you in the home viewing audience would do well to adhere to where it involves Horror films: IF IT WAS PG-13 IN THE THEATERS, AN UNRATED DVD VERSION WILL BE THE SAME! Yes, I'm afraid that this film set back one of my favorite genre's Werewolf movies, back at least a century, destroying the trailblazing work wrought by Dog Soldiers and Ginger Snaps. Damn you Wes Craven, damn you to hell!

2. The Ring 2. How very interesting that the lovely Naomi Watts makes both my best and worst list of the year, but that is exactly what happened. Do I blame her for this stinker? Yes and every person involved with this mess, especially Hideo Nakata who was not only the director for this film, but the director of the original as well. It's a sad state of affairs when you can't even properly direct a remake of your own movie! Maybe it was a language barrier. The actors all moved around like they were confused most of the time. I'm sure that for the most part they weren't fluent in Japanese and perhaps that explains this atrocity. Maybe it also explains a boring, muddled storyline, crappy CGI deer and an almost comical looking main villain. Whatever is the case, chuck this down the well and watch the original instead.

3. Frankenstein Reborn. A very dull retelling of the Frankenstein mythos set in modern times with derivatives of all the original names of the story. The monster resembles the one in I was a Teenage Frankenstein but has none of the campy value of that film. If you see this one in the video store please pass it by, you have been warned. It's a snoozefest from the git-go. Terrible acting and sets so poorly lit that at times it's very difficult to discern who is who and what is going on. Not that you really want to know, no more than you wanted to know such garbage like this unentertaining schlock existed on this planet. Stay far, far away from this crap.

4. Land of the Dead. George A. Romero is not one of the best directors alive and working today. Do not be fooled by the hype. He has two excellent movies and one good one to his resume and the rest are pure tripe. Land of the Dead falls into his list of DOA's and is a big disappointment to most of his fans who expected so much more since the twenty plus years since his last installment in the "Dead" series. Filled to overflowing with illogical situations and inanities, it is little wonder studios found it extremely difficult to finance this excursion into mediocrity. I think it is safe to assume that Romero peaked with Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead was his swan song. Anything he has directed since those films stand as a testimonial to what could have been, but sadly wasn't.

5. Haute Tension. Before this French film was ever released over here, I was bombarded on various message boards and web sites that are Horror oriented, about how great this film was, a must see for any Horror aficionado, it was the savoir of the modern Horror film...you get the picture. After I viewed this, I kept wondering if I was watching the film that everyone was touting was so great. A quick peek at the box, told me indeed I was. More than any other film on my list, this one had so much potential from the start and quickly lost it after a couple of characters viewed a store video tape. After that it plummets faster than a comet in space. It left me feeling miserable that Horror may be truly dead, its fans so desperate for fresh air, will embrace ANYTHING that isn't a remake. This film is just a sad reminder that our beloved genre is turning to dust right before our eyes like a vampire staked out in the sun.

And there you have it, my picks and pans of the year. Feel free to add your lists and comments in these threads.
 

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Ok, didn't see Cursed, but heard nothing but bad things.
The 1st Ring scared the hell out of me, the 2nd was utter crap.
Haven't even heard of Frankenstein Reborn
Gonna have to disagree with you on Land of the Dead, I loved it and it had a great feel and great gore.
FINALLY someone who agrees with me on High Tension, dear lord am I tired of being told this is the greatest film to come along in years. BULL****. I guessed the M. Nights Shamalamadingdong-esq ending about 15 minutes into it, a couple of nice gore scenes, but all in all, utter ****.
 

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I saw "Cursed" on DVD - I thought it was OK (for DVD)
1st Ring was great - the sequel sucked. Too much physe
Frankenstein Reborn- didn't even know that existed
I did like "Land of the Dead" - Because of sooo many of these films, I try to keep my expectations at a minimum
High Tension - Didn't see it but I did hear nothing but good reviews because of the new remake of "The Hills have Eyes" that the director was doing. Everyone kept bringing that up.
Amityville Horror - again - remake (what can I say)
Boogeyman - I really didn't care for it.
House of Wax - Was glad to see Paris Hilton get killed. That's it.
Darkwater - Went to the theaters to see - I should have waited for DVD
 

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Wow, sin..I really disagree with you about LOTD...I thought it was pretty darn good! Romero may not be the best, but this film rocks! Sometimes you gotta stop and smell the "sky flowers"..

I agree about house of Wax..Best part was Hiltons head getting skewered..

I disagree with you Da Weiner ..I LOVED Boogeyman....Great startle scenes, caught me over and over..I jumped 5 times! Story was cool too!
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Dr Morbius said:
Wow, sin..I really disagree with you about LOTD...I thought it was pretty darn good! Romero may not be the best, but this film rocks! Sometimes you gotta stop and smell the "sky flowers"..

I agree about house of Wax..Best part was Hiltons head getting skewered..
I'll tackle the last one first. Hilton's head has probably been skewered many times. Maybe not by a sharp, pointed object...then again, maybe it has. It might explain why this dummy is so damn stupid. Did you know, she's SERIOUSLY being considered to play the role of Mother Theresa in an upcoming film? I have a vivid imagination, but I couldn't make this up no matter how hard I try. :D

As for LOTD, didn't you find it the least bit silly that the citizens of Fiddlers Green had the stenches totally at their mercy and didn't use the Dead Reckoning to blow their asses into so much rotten slag? Instead, they had Reilly say one of the worst cheesy lines ever recorded in cinematic history: "They're just looking for a home too." Gimme a ****ing break! I wouldn't have finished blasting that place to so much rubble until I was satisfied that none of the zombies were moving. Big Daddy! Huh?! What a joke! I really believe that Romero needs to take a step back, re-examine his first three movies in the series and learn something from this bomb. It is possible to make a good zombie film in this day and age, he just failed miserably in his fourth attempt, and almost single-handedly alienated the fans who put him where he's at today. Believe me, I'll read very, very carefully any script that's attached to any movie he's doing in the future before deciding whether or not I plop down ten bucks to go see it in the theaters, or watching it as a rental. George A. Romero owes me 1.5 hours back of my life that I'm certain will never be repaid.
 

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Sinister, can I assume you're not a fan of ms. Hilton's? I saw the vapid bimbo's first, uhhum, 'film', (girl HAS to be the lousiest lay on the planet) and I'm with you, what crack-addled producer could possibly see this twit as Mother Theresa???
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Brad Green said:
Sinister, can I assume you're not a fan of ms. Hilton's? I saw the vapid bimbo's first, uhhum, 'film', (girl HAS to be the lousiest lay on the planet) and I'm with you, what crack-addled producer could possibly see this twit as Mother Theresa???
You assume a'right, my friend. "Crack" may indeed be the culprit here. That, and the "skewered head" deal I spoke of earlier...
 

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Sinister said:
I'll tackle the last one first. Hilton's head has probably been skewered many times. Maybe not by a sharp, pointed object...then again, maybe it has. It might explain why this dummy is so damn stupid. Did you know, she's SERIOUSLY being considered to play the role of Mother Theresa in an upcoming film? I have a vivid imagination, but I couldn't make this up no matter how hard I try. :D

As for LOTD, didn't you find it the least bit silly that the citizens of Fiddlers Green had the stenches totally at their mercy and didn't use the Dead Reckoning to blow their asses into so much rotten slag? Instead, they had Reilly say one of the worst cheesy lines ever recorded in cinematic history: "They're just looking for a home too." Gimme a ****ing break! I wouldn't have finished blasting that place to so much rubble until I was satisfied that none of the zombies were moving. Big Daddy! Huh?! What a joke! I really believe that Romero needs to take a step back, re-examine his first three movies in the series and learn something from this bomb. It is possible to make a good zombie film in this day and age, he just failed miserably in his fourth attempt, and almost single-handedly alienated the fans who put him where he's at today. Believe me, I'll read very, very carefully any script that's attached to any movie he's doing in the future before deciding whether or not I plop down ten bucks to go see it in the theaters, or watching it as a rental. George A. Romero owes me 1.5 hours back of my life that I'm certain will never be repaid.
Ah, Sin..very well argued, and I certainly agree with you about Romero. I never said the movie didn't have it's flaws, it's not perfect, but I still liked it. What's wrong with big Daddy? He is a cool character! He will lead us zombies into revolution....you didn't think you would stay alive forever, did you? hehe..Also, I'm not so sure the Citizens if Fiddlers Green were really in that much control..They lost people constantly going after supplies and such...even with Dead Reckoning.

Plus, I love Dennis Hopper...I love almost anything he is in...I just don't get that emotional about movies I guess, and therefore I am more tolerant.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Dr Morbius said:
Ah, Sin..very well argued, and I certainly agree with you about Romero. I never said the movie didn't have it's flaws, it's not perfect, but I still liked it. What's wrong with big Daddy? He is a cool character! He will lead us zombies into revolution....you didn't think you would stay alive forever, did you? hehe..Also, I'm not so sure the Citizens if Fiddlers Green were really in that much control..They lost people constantly going after supplies and such...even with Dead Reckoning.

Plus, I love Dennis Hopper...I love almost anything he is in...I just don't get that emotional about movies I guess, and therefore I am more tolerant.
Emotional? Nah! I just have a hard time seeing people making a lot of money putting out crap while we, the hard working folk who break our backs wanting a little more, are subjected to stuff like this.

I agree with the stupidity of the people of Fiddlers Green. How long did they think paper thin plywood and stoned militia were going to hold out the undead? If Romero got anything right in this film it was the state of apathy that we the human race have sunk down to.
 

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I liked Land of The Dead. My only problem being the "I'll listen to music while on a Zombie look-out" part.

Cursed..WHAT A WASTE!! I could cry.

Worst...it was a 2004 release..but I hate "Van Helsing" so much I'm going to drag that movie behind my car straight on through to 2007!
 

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No. You are as slim as Kate Moss. I admire anyone who will take a bullet for their guilty pleasure movies!
I'm not brave enough yet...not after my "Navy Seals" incident at filmschool! Lol.

PS: I'm closing the open door where you reply:"Who said anything about feeling guilty!" :)
 

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You aren't ignorant or fat. We need to get the old self-esteem bot up and running! Not making any films now.After you outed my drinking problem! :)

"Navy Seals" 1990? Starring Charlie Sheen & Michael Biehn. Great dialog...

Scene:
A swarm of terrorists open fire on the Seal Team. Said terrorists choose to hide behind an enormous propane tank.

Charlie plucks a grenade from his webbing,pulls the pin,and says:

"I hope they paid their gas bill."

Toss ------"BOOM!!"
 

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I'm not being a smart ass when I say "I'm glad someone enjoyed it".

That's cool Frighteners that you & Morbius like it. I may vent in detail about Van Helsing another time. But just so you know,we may disagree on certain topics,but I would never intentionally disrespect you,or anyone else here on the board.

Kate Beckinsale sure has her fans. I don't know why..but she just doesn't do anything for me. Now;..Katharine (ginger) Isabelle on the other hand...

Well..you know how I feel about her by now! :)

Respect.
 
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